23.2.08

Relating to Jane Fairfax

Do you remember Jane? Fairfax? from Emma? If you are not a dedicated fan of Jane Austen, you may not quite get this post. Please read on... just consider yourself warned.
Do you remember the part in Emma, where we are beginning to discover some things about the character Jane? She's orphaned, penniless, elegant & secretly engaged to "what's-his-name". Well, I never really got her. I have thought her singing lovely, her manners cool and her taste in men predictable. I have never lost sleep over this I simply enjoy observing minor characters more closely when I view a movie more than once. Well, she is one of them, minor, but also a bit strange. I have never minded her reduced circumstances, her talent, her beauty. I have just been curious and somewhat at a loss of why she relates so well to her aunts, Mrs. & Miss Bates. I have found myself starring, like you would at a monkey throwing poo in a zoo, at their family. How was she not annoyed by them as most everyone else was? Did she really enjoy and delight in them as she appeared to? How did she feel safe and loved with two such strange birds?
I was thinking about this as I went to a gathering last night.
Some women from my church got together to eat, do projects & to talk. I enjoyed it. I enjoy them. And for a brief moment I realized that I totally get Jane Fairfax. (I am in no way comparing these fun, lively, creative & engaging ladies to the Bates' ladies.) I am, however, finding friends and confidants in unexpected places. When I was with those ladies I felt like I could say or do anything, (I am not saying I should), simply because they don't mind me. They will talk with me or not, they laugh with me, are willing to listen & show on their faces their delight at seeing me. They are open to me asking "why" or "how", they share trinkets of wisdom from their experience, they laugh freely. And even though these are things I treasure in my closest peer-age friends, there is a difference in the delight and acceptance from my older friends...and no I don't know what it is. Maybe it is a difference in me when I am with them. Maybe it is knowing that I can't be like them yet, because they have a few years on me. Maybe it is relating to people who have made it through what I am going through, and seeing that they haven't lost a leg or anything. I just like it. I treasure sitting down with my aunt after everyone has gone to bed and hearing what she is thinking about. I love catching a few moments of an older women's time and knowing and being known by her. My favorite part about Saturdays, which I spend working at church all day, is when my Mumsy and her 2 close friends pop in to decorate and set up for church. I love to hear them kindly bicker over where to put the flowers, or what color best brings out the banner for that week. It brings me such hope that they are still a group of goofy girls who want to talk and hang out. Often one of them will stop in to my little cave and talk to me for a moment and I just love it.
So, for a little part of the evening yesterday I got Jane Fairfax. She is probably like me, and is surprised but grateful for finding friends in unexpected places, even if those "places" are stages of life.

3.2.08

This Is Why I'm Not!








Blogging, that is. My excuse is the usual "I've been busy", but I really mean it. Since the week after Christmas I have traveled to Nashvegas, Chattavegas & back for a restful yet fun-filled week of break-dancing, bridge-walking, and Dutch-Blitz playing.
Words are inadequate to describe how good it was to see my sister. (sigh) I will just say this... I love her, miss her and am better when I am around her.
I also had some neat time with Jin, Brian & Susan, Stace & the lovely rest. Brian & Susan had Julie & I over for New Year's Eve. Can I just say something? We are officially old. We played Cinco, Scattegories and then went to bed. I love being around other youngish-tired-older peeps.
We went twice to this all night cafe in Nashville where interesting people gather. We were drawn partly by the "breaking" group that performed there. ("Breaking", for anyone who has blocked out any or all of the 80's, is similar to "break-dancing". Just don't call it that. I was told it is not cool.) Whatever you want to call it - it is fun to see live.
Some other highlights of my trip included a chance to follow Jina at Siloam, the non profit clinic where she works as a nurse practitioner. I loved seeing her in that environment, using her gifts, flourishing and loving the people God brings. I especially loved hearing her speak Spanish and watching how she cares for her patients thoroughly and gently.
I enjoyed meeting more of Jina's and Julie's friends, and hanging out with Stacy's roomies. I think it is the best vacation to go where your friends are. I will be ready to go again in about a month. (I wish)

One week after my return I had the joy of going to Hume Lake two weekends in a row with my highschool then my jr. high youth-groups. Whew! I'm getting tired just typing that. I said "joy" and I mean joy. But in spite of my love for those kids I did have some anxiety about each weekend. The first weekend I was worried about how our group would mix together, about driving in the snow, about eating camp food, about falling on the ice and breaking the few uninjured bones I have left. Thankfully the people I asked to pray for me did, and as the first weekend came and went I didn't even remember what I had been nervous about. That easyness was short lived. I turned around to head back up the mountain only to find myself pre-occupied with mixing, driving, eating, falling & breaking. I love that I don't have to get things perfectly for God to swoop in a save. I can now proudly say I have driven through a snow storm that was almost a "white out", survived two weekends with only one fall on the ice, ate great food, enjoyed the kids & got to see my sweet friends Em & Lu Martian, (aka Marschner). All in all I am grateful to be home, enjoying the rain, and hoping to catch up on some sleep.