One day after work, it hit me, and & I sat down to do the math.
1 plus 1 plus 2 plus 1.
That's five
in case the hint of a word problem caused your eyes to begin to glaze.
Five nieces & nephews in the short span of 20 months, have arrived into the Whitacre family.
The next math problem I started to work out was how many vacation days I had saved to visit this gaggle of newbies.
I was able to fly back to see my sweet sister, Jules, and meet her twin bundles of squeaks in April. Ava Gray and Havyn were born March 7, 2011. Tiny but mighty (like their Aunt Jill).
(me, Jules, & Havyn)
It was such a precious and difficult time.
We spent a lot of time at the hospital as Julie's oldest twin is still in the NICU. In between the back and forth of the hospital I was able to enjoy some beautiful Tennessee Tornado weather.
(Julie & her eldest Ava Gray)
It is just crazy & cool to me that you can love someone so much before you even get to meet them, and then you meet them & your like "Oh good, here you are! I love you like crazy & now I am going to kiss your face a bazillion times!"
And let me tell you, I have kissed their faces a bazillion times...
and it is just never enough.
Exhibit A:
me kissing Havyn.
Havyn trying to kiss me back...
Did I mention some other faces I had the pleasure of kissing?
love
love
love them (Susan, Rose & Brian)
It was also delightful to see my sister in her new role as a mother. I knew that she would be a tender, selfless, & creative mom - because that is just who she is. Trust me, if she was all those things to me, her annoying baby sister, then those are her true colors. I am proud to say that I in some small way feel less guilty about the "bug" that I was growing up, because I can see that God has used my strengths (read sinfulness) to grow her strengths (read angelic-ness).
I am surprised that she has taken to it so naturally. I don't know what I expected, I think it was just the going from "what will that look like?" to "Oh, that's what she's like as a mom! Cool!"
Another thing that is so precious to see is that God continues to draw her heart out in newer and deeper ways. And she in turn is learning to let the rest of us "in". I am grateful for His love and care for that new little family.
The 5th Whit kid to arrive opted for an exciting entrance into the world. I won't tell
his story (or Tim & Jill's), but I will show a photo I took 5 minutes after Tim delivered his son & moments after the paramedics arrived.
Elijah Ryan!
Doesn't he seem surprisingly relaxed compared to the drama surrounding his birth?
I, on the other hand was not relaxed. It seriously happened so fast.
You have no idea!
Which is exactly what I stammered to the paramedics & firefighters who swooped in after I called.
I had a lot of anxiety that increased over the following few days. I kept flashing back to Jill's scream, or to her & Tim on the bed, me running to find towels, running to call 911, running to find a robe for Jill.
I normally love that kind of excitement, but having literally 3 seconds to change gears from "This is going to be a long night" to "IT'S COMING!!!" sort of freaked me out. I also thought something was wrong for everything to happen so quickly, and then Jill couldn't talk after the baby was born & so I had a lot of anxiety about her being ok.
I am so grateful that God had everything under control. His timing is perfect, and I am learning that in new ways these days.
I had some good talks with my important people - Annalaura, my siblings, my roommie, Brooke, God - and by Sunday evening I was sleeping better & really felt like I could let it go. I can't even imagine how I would be coping if anything had gone wrong. I am grateful for God's care about the smallest things - like babies & unnecessary anxiety.
I prayed, and kept saying "Jill & Eli are ok" every time I remembered something stressful or thought of something I could have done differently. Also, Susan, my other baby sister-in-law, encouraged me to be affirming in how I thought through it afterwards, which really did help.
Another thing that helped me work through my post traumatic stress (Brooke laughed when I called it that - but it felt like it!) was this...
holding Eli.
I also wanted to hold Jill some, but I settled for talking with her. She's so precious & strong & hard on herself & honest & cool!
A few things that made me laugh when I replayed the night in my mind were these:
1) The phrase "Babies having babies" popped into my head at one point when I ran into their bedroom after Tim called for me to give him a hand. I realized what was happening and thought "we can't do this here" and "wait a minute, these are two babies, having a baby, shouldn't a grown up be in charge?"
2) Right before the paramedics arrived Tim asked me to find a robe for Jill. I ran all over the house, searching the packed hospital bag I had thrown into the van in the 3 seconds between Jill's water breaking & the baby crowning, through their closet. I could not find a robe, or any robe-like thing, for that matter. I did find one of Tim's flannel jackets and pulled that out to throw on Jill. She held up her hand when she saw it and said authoritatively "I'm not wearing that! That's Tim's favorite Jacket!" Both Tim & I tried to assure her that it could be easily cleaned and that it was fine. She was adamant. Thankfully I found a clean sheet in the dryer and we wrapped her up like a Greek goddess.
3) When Jill's mom & I arrived at the hospital later to bring Tim & Jill their car & bags, Jill was already joking that she had planned this dramatic birth so that I could meet the handsome firemen & paramedics who helped us. She is so thoughtful. She even waited until Kelly (her sister) & I could go with them to thank our heros with a plate of cookies.
4) Jude meeting Eli for the first time was precious. He kissed Eli's face so many times. And I knew exactly why. You just can't resist, no matter how old you are!
Here is the first face I couldn't resist kissing...
(Jude getting his face painted at our little Art in the Park festivities)
